Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Female Forrest Gumps

Walking to school today, I was following behind a woman on wedge-heeled boots. I might as well have been following a woman handicapped in her legs. Her feet seemed totally disjointed from her shoes, which gave me the impression of watching someone with not one, but two twisted feet. She reminded me of the scene where young Forrest Gump was dancing for Elvis (I happened to see that on tv last night.)

After the woman with the wedge-heels and I parted, I found myself walking beside a woman with a double limp. It might have been badly-fitting sandals -- those chunky ones that shouldn't be too hard to balance on; she was dragging both sides of her shoes in turn. She was lifting her feet, but just not enough to compensate for her shoes such that she was dragging them both. It sounded like a terrible terrible limp.

All that said, I am guilty of wearing shoes that are not too comfortable at times. I only hope that I didn't look that ridiculous to onlookers. Someone forgot to teach women of my generation the importance of feigning comfort when wearing our chosen instrument of torture. After all, they were meant to make us look better, not worse.

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